A SERPENT’S EGG
“A man identified in the program as A Civil Servant climbs a forlorn mountain somewhere in Germany. The time is the 1950’s. Warning himself first of “Caution,” then carrying on a monologue about accidents and murder, he sets out a picnic, complete with tablecloth, wine glass, expensive silver and bone china. He wonders aloud if somebody’s coming, then cancels his thoughts with ‘But of course nobody comes,’ and the mountain takes on the kind of resonance we hear skittering across Beckett’s sere landscapes. Finally someone does come, one Herr Gutzmann, who claims to own the mountain, and accuses the picnicker of trespassing.
“The Civil Servant is gutsier than his manner suggests. He’s had a life without much money and has lived with a threat: a malignant tumor—the serpent’s egg—hatching on the left side of his neck. He is shy, sensitive, loves beauty and nature. Gutzmann is crass, avaricious, a lout. He humiliates the little man who tries to placate him with some of his lunch. But Gutzmann, a hunter on the spoor for the kill, continues his mocking savagery. In this instance, however, the intended victim is the victor. After suggesting that Gutzmann may have killed Shtupmann, who owned the mountain before he did, the Civil Servant manages to shatter Gutzmann’s ankle. He leaves him on the mountain top. The last we hear is Gutzmann’s echoing cry of ‘Help!’
“Ronald Ribman is an unusual dramatist, real and surreal at one and the same time, and concerned with moral and ethical issues. His trilogy—with all its open-ended complexity, with all its possible interpretations—is compelling theater. If you missed ‘Sweet Table at the Richelieu,’ you may assume ‘Cannibal Masque’ and ‘Serpent’s Egg’ are…well, just appetizers. They’re more than that.” — Kevin Kelly, The Boston Globe
“Both plays [‘The Cannibal Masque’ and ‘A Serpent’s Egg’] are filled with delicious twists…Both plays are about those who appear to have power and those who appear not to have it. Questions are posed—Who are the victims? Who are the victimizers? How can we tell?—that have no sure answers…These plays crackle. Ribman’s arch, harsh dialogue is stretched out straight as a wire.” — William K. Gale, The Journal-Bulletin
“…the swift, nervous dialogue in these two plays is sparse and lean…the plots are equally lean, focusing on a single intense confrontation between two characters…Unlike the alienated inhabitants of many modern dramas, Ribman’s characters understand each other perfectly well—and that is the scary part. They are able to play upon one another’s transparent weaknesses to get what they want…In a ‘Serpent’s Egg’ a humble civil servant (Jeremy Geidt) standing triumphantly atop an actual mountain slope smiles enigmatically while speculating that many mountain accidents were actually premeditated suicides or murders…Geidt warns us of the danger of tripping on a stone, as precarious as a serpent’s egg perched in a mountain nest, that could come crashing down on us. There is a surrealistic and macabre feeling here, common to both plays, that makes us search for a subtext beyond the obvious.” — Indira Lakshmanan
“‘A Serpent’s Egg’ picks up the melody of ‘The Cannibal Masque’ and transforms it in a very different setting and dynamic…The story is energized by the civil servant’s suggestion that Gutzmann might be responsible for a man’s death on the mountain, which could have been a murder. As they argue over that allegation, the civil servant exposes a large tumor on his neck, ‘the serpent’s egg.’ This foreshadowing of evil drives the narrative on its way, unleashing a victim who victimizes…‘The Serpent’s Egg’—and the entire trilogy—has a fairytale quality about it. The meaning of the plays becomes like clay in the hands of the theatergoer, creating lasting images that become intensely personal.” — Timothy C. Morgan, The Sentinel-Enterprise
Sample Excerpt:
GUTZMANN
You don’t get rich being stupid.
CIVIL SERVANT
How fortunate you are, mein Herr. In most instances I have never been able to find a way to get what I want.
GUTZMANN
If the world treats you like you were a dog to be whipped, you have only yourself to blame for it.
CIVIL SERVANT
If, for example, I were a property owner such as yourself, and I wished to own this mountain, I would probably be unable to find a way to convince Herr Stuppmann to sell it to me.
GUTZMAN
You couldn’t convince a goat to grow a beard.
CIVIL SERVANT
And yet you found a way to deal with Herr Stuppmann.
GUTZMANN
I didn’t have to deal with Herr Stuppmann. I told you he died on this mountain. I dealt with his family.
CIVIL SERVANT
How fortunate for you.
GUTZMANN
Yes, that’s right. Stuppmann never parted with anything he owned. Not a crumb to a dog.
CIVIL SERVANT
One might almost say it was a brilliant stroke of luck.
GUTZMANN
Luck had nothing to do with it. I leave luck to imbeciles such as yourself, waiting your entire life to win door prizes and sweepstakes.
CIVIL SERVANT
Yes, of course, as you say, luck had nothing to do with it.
GUTZMANN
What are you getting at, Herr Chicken Feather? Are you accusing me of something?
CIVIL SERVANT
Not at all, Herr Property Owner. I was merely envious of your good fortune. You wish for a mountain, the owner will not, as you say, part with a crumb for a dog, and yet you find a way to get the mountain. (Removing the muffler about his neck to reveal a large ugly tumor on his neck) I, as you can see, have no luck at all.
GUTZMANN
What is that ugly thing?
CIVIL SERVANT
A small tumor no bigger than a serpent’s egg, Herr Gutzmann. The doctors at first assured me it was not malignant. But, as I have said, I have no luck.
GUTZMANN
It turns my stomach just looking at it.
CIVIL SERVANT
I had it removed, but it comes back.
GUTZMANN
Then keep it covered. (Tossing away the remains of his lunch) You’ve made me lose my appetite…And hurrying up with what you’re doing. I have appointments to keep.
CIVIL SERVANT
Bad luck seems to be an inherent quality with me. I can’t stop myself from falling into it, even now.
GUTZMANN
What are you talking about?
CIVIL SERVANT
You see, Herr Gutzmann, for some strange reason known only to myself, as soon as you said you found Herr Stuppmann’s body upon this slope, I took it into my head that you were the murderer.
GUTZMANN
You’d better watch what you’re saying, my little Chicken Wing.
CIVIL SERVANT
Yes, of course, I better watch what I’m saying. As a matter of fact, I had better not have said anything at all. If you are not the murderer, I have accused you for no reason at all. And, if you are the murderer, I have placed myself in a very precarious position.
GUTZMANN
Herr Stuppmann was the victim of an accident.
CIVIL SERVANT
Yes, yes, of course. Absolutely. I agree with you. He was without question the victim of an accident.
GUTZMANN
Because if I were the murderer I would be very foolish allowing you to leave this mountain top alive, Herr Chicken Neck. If I were the murderer I would seriously have to consider the necessity of breaking your neck to keep you still.
CIVIL SERVANT
And if I were talking to the murderer, I would assure him that blackmail was the last thing I had in mind.
GUTZMANN
But if I were the murderer I could never be sure of that.
CIVIL SERVANT
So if I were talking to the murderer, I would have to tell him that I have already placed my suspicions in the hands of a reputable third party with instructions to open the letter in the event of my death.
GUTZMANN
(Standing up and firmly grasping his walking stick) But, of course, I’m not the murderer.
CIVIL SERVANT
(Picking up a stone, large and round as a grapefruit, and suddenly smashing it down on Herr Gutzmann’s ankle) Of course not. (Gutzmann screams out in pain, hopping around, holding his ankle)
GUTZMANN
Ow! Ow! You’ve broken my ankle!
CIVIL SERVANT
Yes, of course.
GUTZMANN
You imbecile! You madman! What do you mean, “Of course”? What is the matter with you?
CIVIL SERVANT
Nothing, Herr Gutzmann.
GUTZMANN
Then why did you break my ankle? I will sue you for this! I will have the courts take away everything you own! I will see to it you spend a dozen years in jail!
CIVIL SERVANT
Quite right, Herr Gutzmann. I would do exactly the same. (Starting to exit, picnic hamper in hand)
GUTZMANN
Wait! Don’t leave me here!
CIVIL SERVANT
Perhaps we will meet again next spring when the snow begins to melt. Goodbye, Herr Mountain King.
GUTZMANN
Wait! Wait! (But the Civil Servant is already gone) I will see to it that you are punished! I will be waiting for you with the police when you get down to the bottom of the mountain! (Touching his ankle) Ow! (Shouting out again) You will not get away with this, you insignificant nothing! You meaningless zero! There will be no spring for you or your tumor! Nobody can live with an ugly tumor like that! (Touching his ankle again) Ow! (Calling out) Hello? Hello? Is there anybody out there? Herr Gutzmann needs help! Hello? Hello? (To himself) The devil take everyone. I will save myself. (Starting to hop offstage, down the mountain) I know every inch of this mountain. Herr Gutzmann requires no help! (Disappearing off-stage. After a moment there is the sharp crack of stones smashing together and Gutzmann cries out) Ow! Ow! (Silence for some moments, and then…) Gutzmann needs help! Ow! Ow! (As the lights fade, one final cry, soft, forlorn) Gutzmann needs help.